Robbie Dupree’s Bizarre Send-up to “Girls in Cars”

Best known for his smooth 1980 hits “Steal Away” and “Hot Rod Hearts”, famed dad rocker Robbie Dupree probably didn’t seem like a natural fit for the midnight world of “sports entertainment,” yet by 1987 his rapidly fading star prompted him to release “Girls in Cars” on the WWF compilation Piledriver: The Wrestling Album II. “Girls in Cars” is the deluded saga of one man’s love-hate relationship with, well, girls in cars. You see, as much as Dupree finds women in cars intoxicating, they pose a serious problem when he’s riding around town simply going about his business. In a classic case of victim blaming, Dupree accuses these beautiful women of going “a bit too far” in exercising their mobility rights at the expense of his safety. How about just keeping your eyes on the road, pal? As expected, the song’s video features plenty of women in vehicles of all shapes and sizes. There’s even a couple of scooters thrown in for good measure (for fuck’s sake, let’s not get carried away here), as well as some rather odd footage of Dupree awkwardly rocking out on a beach and getting buzzed by seagulls. Making a derogatory comparison between women and birds? I guess we shouldn’t expect much from a track on a wrestling album. Oddly enough, Dupree never specifies if he prefers his titular “Girls in Cars” behind the wheel or riding shotgun. They just need to be in a damn car and his “imagination takes it from there.” Well, you do you, Robbie. We can only hope he’s packing plenty of Kleenex when cruising the waterfront and looking after his own “piledriver.” While a horndog testament to the male gaze might be viewed as clashing with the homoerotic spectacle of pro wrestling, an instrumental version of “Girls in Cars” served as the theme music for Strike Force, a tag team comprised of pretty boys Rick Martel and Tito Santana (wait, who am I supposed to be gawking at here?). And it’s a catchy enough tune, albeit clunky in parts, but “Girls in Cars” doesn’t exactly make for the kind of prematch anthem that electrifies the crowd and intimidates an opponent. Nobody was hailing from Parts Unknown with this shit. As for Dupree himself, the video closes with him trying to hitchhike and failing to catch a ride with the very “Girls in Cars” he’s been objectifying these last few minutes. That sounds about right. In other words, it’s a perfect tune for the arrested development and lonely existence that’s usually part and parcel of being a pro wrestling fan. So why split hairs about it? These “Girls in Cars” aren’t gonna sing about themselves – they’ve got better things to do. Carry on, Robbie!

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