Wed, 07/17/2013 - 00:39 by Natasha Neale
The Encyclopedia Hearsay was founded on four principles: misinformation, rumours, half-remembered conversations and outright lies. Anyone can contribute so long as articles are written with no research whatsoever. If you are citing The Land Before Time as a source or abusing footnotes like David Foster Wallace, you are on the right track.
Josie and the Pussycats is a film from the early 2000s and the primary root of my infatuation with Rachael Leigh Cook1. The story centres around three women in their early twenties who are in a “cunk2” band called The Pussycats in some rural American hick town. Early on, the band isn’t successful, but Rachael Leigh Cook is still successful in stealing my heart.
By complete and utter chance, a scheming American record executive–who is British for some reason–stumbles upon the band playing one of their unsuccessful shows. Why he doesn’t immediately kidnap Rachael Leigh Cook while he has the chance is beyond me, but I guess that’s why he’s in the record business and I’m in the stalker business3. Anyway, he tells the band he wants to sign them and obviously they say yes. They are then whisked away to the big city and given “urban” makeovers in a classic plot-hole covering montage.
With their new trendy looks, the band heads to the recording studio only to discover the label wants to change the name of the band to Josie and The Pussy Cats. To which all I can say is, “no shit”. Rachael Leigh Cook plays Josie. She is a goddess. My bedroom is wallpapered with pictures of her. Obviously the band is going to be about her. But for some reason the two other girls in the band, Blondie and Tallie, are bummed out about it4. So there is some in-fighting, miscommunication and for a short, glorious while, it seems like the movie is going to be all about Rachael Leigh Cook. But it’s not.
Apparently, the third act of the movie contains some nonsense about the record label trying to use the band’s music to brainwash teenagers5. The band finds out and they’re pissed because it violates the principles of “cunk” music. They end up breaking all the brainwashing technology and playing a big concert to let their fans decide about the music for themselves. This also, conveniently, serves as a metaphor that in life you should stay true to yourself and never follow the herd6.
Oh, there’s also some romantic subplot involving Rachael Leigh Cook and some dude from the hick town, but I’ve blocked that out of my memory because, fuck that guy.
1 Because, as if, Tara Reid.
2 This terms refers to a “female punk” band. You figure it out.
3 It’s not really a business, per se.
4 They should be thankful to even still be in the presence of Josie.
5 I stopped watching the movie after I paused it on the first shot of RLC in glitter. I’ve never un-paused it.
6 Why else have I devoted my life to making Rachael Leigh Cook my bride?
7 And because I murdered him for looking at her.
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